Task initiation shmask shminitiation
"Just start." "Just do it." "Take the first step."
If you have ADHD, this advice makes you want to scream. Because the problem isn't that you don't want to start - it's that you literally can't make your body do the thing.
In this episode, Em and Elliott talk about the wall between thinking and doing, what's actually happening in ADHD brains when the start button won't work, and why "just start" adds shame instead of helping. Plus: what actually works instead (and why Em refuses anesthetic at the dentist).
In this episode:
The wall: thinking obsessively about a task and being physically unable to begin
What it looks like from the outside (Elliott's perspective on the "I need to clean the kitchen" texts)
The science: ADHD brains have a faulty start button (like the Tucson that can't find the key fob even though you're holding it)
The paradox that makes you feel like a liar: sometimes you CAN start immediately on interesting things
Why "just start" adds shame instead of helping
What actually works: body doubling, externalizing the first step, removing friction, pairing with dopamine, the 90-second trick, medication
Two types of "I can't start": protection (your brain knows you don't have capacity) vs. executive dysfunction (you need support)
The laundry damned-if-you-do situation
How neurotypical people just... brush their teeth without thinking about it (wild)
Elliott's reminder: being imperfect is perfect
Key moment: "I can do anything for 90 seconds" - Em's philosophy from refusing anesthetic at the dentist (yes, really)
Resources mentioned:
